


大好きでたまらないよ

by SocialDegenerate



Category: Uta no Prince-sama
Genre: Angst and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2019-07-05
Packaged: 2020-06-09 23:42:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19486381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SocialDegenerate/pseuds/SocialDegenerate
Summary: Ren isdisgustinglyin love with Masato, and Syo and Natsuki are determined to make it happen...even if it means that push has to come to shove.A tale of teenage boys who just aren't good at emotional things (or protecting their phone passwords).“I always forget how dumb you pretend to be sometimes but I’ve got things to be doing that don’t involve arguing with you about this, so I’m gonna leave you to your, uh,” Syo tapped the screen and read out the title of the video Ren had been caught watching, “‘Hijirikawa Masato Sexiest Moments’? Wow, Ren. Kinda wish you had just been watching porn, to be honest.”





	大好きでたまらないよ

**Author's Note:**

> I guess this is set around 2000% but I happily mash together game and anime canon because it's my fic and I get to choose what happens. I was actually intending to write something about Maji Love Kingdom but uhhh nope, apparently that wasn't happening...maybe next time...

“What are you watching?”

Ren jolted and didn’t quite manage to suppress it as he rushed to turn off his phone screen, Syo’s sudden appearance when Ren was supposed to have the dorms to himself for another hour catching him off-guard. “You’re back early, Ochibi-chan.”

“Shoot finished early. You know, you’re gonna get a lecture if you’re watching porn on the communal couches, people have to sit there.”

“Don’t worry, your pure eyes are safe for another day,” Ren quipped to hide his embarrassment. It probably would have been _less_ mortifying if he had actually been caught watching porn, but there was no way he was going to admit that. Apparently there was something in his voice that gave him away, though, because Syo’s teasing expression became suspicious in an instant.

“You’re a good actor but you’re really not a good liar.” Before Ren could put his phone out of Syo’s reach, it was snatched away from him- and apparently Syo knew his passcode.

How the _hell_ did Syo know his passcode?

“People just let you get away with things because you’re handsome and charming. Now, let’s see what’s got you all worked up.”

“Aww, Ochibi-chan, you think I’m handsome and charming? I’m flattered.” Even layering a flirty tone over his words until they were dripping with it wasn’t enough to break Syo’s focus for Ren to steal his phone back, and it was all he could do to keep a steady, not-bright-red face as Syo stared at the screen and then back at him.

“ _Really,_ Ren?”

“It’s for work.”

“It’s not for work.”

“It’s for blackmail purposes.”

“No, _this,”_ Syo gestured between himself and Ren, “would be good for blackmail purposes. What you’re doing is just sad. You know that if you told him you loved him he’d been down for it, right?”

“I’m not in love with Hijirikawa,” Ren said on reflex, not even sounding convincing to himself. 

“You’re exactly as in love with Hijirikawa as he is with you.”

“Which is not at all, so…”

“I always forget how dumb you pretend to be sometimes but I’ve got things to be doing that don’t involve arguing with you about this, so I’m gonna leave you to your, uh,” Syo tapped the screen and read out the title of the video Ren had been caught watching, “‘Hijirikawa Masato Sexiest Moments’? _Wow,_ Ren. Kinda wish you had just been watching porn, to be honest.”

“You’ve got one too, do you want me to send you the link?” Teasing Syo was easier than having to face up to what he was actually saying, so Ren shot him a lazy smile that only got him an eye roll in return.

“Do it and I’ll tell Hijirikawa about this.” Handing Ren’s phone back to him, Syo shook his head. “He really likes you a lot, Ren. You should-”

“He tolerates me because it’s beneficial for the future head of the Hijirikawa Group to be friendly with the Jinguji Group. We’re not like you and Shinomi.” The sting of that felt too real, Ren pulling his emotions closer to himself to stop Syo from seeing more than he already had. “And if you tell Hijirikawa about this, I’ll tell Hyuga-sensei about the shrine you have to him.”

“It’s not a shrine,” Syo whined, Ren feeling immensely pleased that he’d finally turned the tide in his favour. Things had gotten too serious for comfort for a moment there, although he wasn’t stupid enough to think that this would be the end of the situation.

Besides, Hyuga probably already knew about the shrine- or could guess. Syo wasn’t exactly subtle.

...Not that Ren could apparently throw too many stones in that department.

“Oh, and by the way,” Syo said, turning to walk off but looking back over his shoulder, “I’d be more likely to believe that you didn’t love Hijirikawa if your phone password wasn’t his birthday.”

“It’s a coincidence,” Ren grumbled, Syo’s laughter trailing behind him as he left the room. 

* * *

Lazily throwing darts at his board, Ren was trying not to be too obvious about how closely he was watching Masato quietly work on his calligraphy. In his concentration his hair would sometimes fall into his face and he would absently tuck it back behind his ear, and then Ren had to be careful that he didn’t miss the dartboard entirely because Masato and Ranmaru had already threatened him about leaving holes in the wall.

Not that he cared what Ranmaru thought, because he was hardly ever around anyway, but he _hated_ being caught by the full force of Masato’s disappointed face.

Ren had just made a perfect bullseye when someone knocked on the door, putting his last remaining dart down as Masato asked, “Jinguji, would you mind?”

“Mm-hmm.” Stretching and running a hand through his hair with a little more drama than was strictly necessary, Ren took a peek at Masato and tried not to sigh when he saw that Masato wasn’t even watching him, his focus already returned to his calligraphy. Crossing the room, Ren opened the door and smiled when he saw Natsuki standing there, a grin on his face and a small container in his hands.

“Hi Ren-kun,” Natsuki said cheerfully, bouncing a little on the spot. “Is Masato-kun here? I brought you two some cupcakes that I made earlier.”

Stepping back to let Natsuki in, Ren glanced over his shoulder and had to stifle a laugh when he saw Masato sitting bolt upright with a look of vague panic on his face. He wasn’t sure why he enjoyed Natsuki’s baking when no one else did, but it was always hilarious to watch while everyone else always tried to scramble away without hurting Natsuki’s feelings.

“Oh, Shinomiya, hello,” Masato said, setting his brush down and jumping to his feet. “Sorry I can’t stay, I’m on my way out the door.”

If Natsuki knew it was a blatant lie he didn’t show it, his brilliant smile completely unwavering. “Take one with you! You need to keep your energy up!”

“I’m, uh, on a diet,” Masato lied, jamming his feet into his shoes and practically fleeing from the room. Ren stuck his head out the door to watch him go and then turned back to Natsuki, closing the door behind them.

“Masato-kun always works so hard,” Natsuki said, pressing the container into Ren’s willing hands. Ren popped the lid and fished a cupcake out, taking a bite and trying to figure out exactly what Natsuki had put in there. The heat of the chili pepper overpowered everything else, which was an odd but not altogether unenjoyable element for a cupcake; Ren had to respect Natsuki’s inventiveness, at least.

“I think that might have melted Hijirikawa’s face off,” Ren laughed, taking another bite. “Thanks for bringing these over, Shinomi.”

“You’re welcome,” Natsuki beamed, Ren wondering- not for the first time- why he’d had to throw his lot in with Ice Queen Hijirikawa instead of someone who actually liked him, like Natsuki. “Actually, I wanted to talk to you, so it’s a good thing Masato-kun had to go.”

“Oh?” Ren said, waving for Natsuki to sit on the couch as he went over to put the container of cupcakes on the edge of the table next to Masato’s calligraphy. Sprawling next to Natsuki, Ren nodded at him. “What’s on your mind?”

“Well, Syo-chan was telling me about what happened the other day, and he thought I might be able to help you out with your problem.”

Natsuki looked so pleased with himself that Ren had to fight back his initial reaction to hunt Syo down and tie him to one of the Shining Saotome statues scattered around the grounds. He really should have known that Syo couldn’t keep anything from Natsuki, and that the pair of them were utterly incapable of minding their own business.

Well, at least he’d gotten cupcakes out of it.

“There’s no problem, Shinomi.”

“But there _is,”_ Natsuki said, nodding seriously. “We want you two to be happy! And you’re not happy right now so we’re going to get you together.”

“I already told Ochibi-chan, he doesn’t like me that way. He puts up with me because he’s impossibly polite and won’t stand for us fighting when we have to live together.”

“He stares at you like you’re the centre of his universe,” Natsuki announced, “and I’m going to help you figure out exactly how to confess to him.”

“This is ridiculous.”

“You could try a song? I’m sure you can break into the PA room again.”

“That’s even _more_ ridiculous,” Ren scoffed. “I’m not going to broadcast my rejection to everyone in the vicinity.”

“Oh! You should bake him some sweets!” Natsuki got a faraway look in his eyes, like he was already coming up with new recipes, and Ren knew he had to dissuade that particular train of thought before Masato couldn’t escape the experience.

“He’s never been big on sweets, so I don’t think that would soften him up.”

“Hmmm.” Frowning in thought, Natsuki tapped his chin until his eyes suddenly went wide, a smile spreading across his face. “I know!”

Ren didn’t answer, simply raising an eyebrow and waiting for Natsuki to explain what had him clasping his hands together in front of his chest.

“We can roleplay!”

“I’m not going to-” Ren started, but although Natsuki’s smile didn’t falter there was a flash of something dangerous behind his glasses that had Ren shuddering. “Okay, fine. But this is going to be mortifying for both of us.”

“Seduce me, Ren-chan!”

Shaking his head in disbelief, Ren figured he might as well go for it. There was a possibility that he could make Natsuki so uncomfortable that he let the situation go entirely, and it wasn’t exactly as if Natsuki was _hard_ on the eyes. 

Ren could think of worse people to flirt with.

“Alright, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.” Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Ren summoned up his playboy persona and stepped into it like a well-tailored suit. “Shinomi.”

“Yes, Ren-kun?” Natsuki said, looking far too excited. Ren shifted closer on the couch until their knees were almost touching, looking at Natsuki with lazy bedroom eyes. “Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?”

It was only years of acting lessons that kept him from laughing, but Natsuki frowned and yelled, “Cut!”

“Really?” Ren said dryly.

“That will never work,” Natsuki announced. “Put your hand here.” 

Grabbing Ren’s hand, Natsuki tugged it until it was sitting high up on his thigh, pulling it back into place when Ren tried to slide it a bit lower. “There, perfect.”

“This is weird.”

“Is it?” Natsuki asked, tucking a piece of Ren’s hair back. It was almost a shame that it did absolutely nothing for Ren, because Natsuki was handsome and friendly and apparently Ren was only up for an impossible challenge.

Deciding to just go with it, Ren leaned in and tilted his face a little, not close enough to look like he was obviously going for a kiss but close enough to give the hint. “Don’t ever leave me, Shinomi.”

“I couldn’t ever,” Natsuki said in an exceedingly poor imitation of what Ren assumed was meant to be Masato’s voice. He was about to tell Natsuki what he thought of the impression when the door suddenly opened, Ren freezing in place as Natsuki grinned and said, “Welcome back, Masato-kun!”

“I...forgot my...You know what, never mind. I’m sorry for interrupting.” Masato’s face was bright red and he was looking anywhere but at them, Ren intensely aware of the fact that he was sitting there with his hand on Natsuki’s thigh and their faces suggestively close. He couldn’t move until the sound of the door slamming shut broke him out of his trance, scrambling back to put some distance between them.

“Oh,” Natsuki said softly, his big, kind eyes wavering as he looked between Ren and the closed door. “I’m sorry, Ren-kun, I never meant to…”

“It’s fine,” Ren lied, Masato’s mortified face imprinted in his mind. That was almost the exact expression he’d imagined Masato making if he ever got wind of Ren’s feelings for him, and it was too close to worst-case scenario for him to be comfortable.

He could probably explain the situation and have Masato understand, but he didn’t know if he could do it without confessing- which was exactly what he’d been trying to avoid in the first place. 

“It’s fine,” Ren repeated, ignoring Natsuki’s stricken expression. “I have to get to work, though, so…”

“I can help fix this.”

“It’s my fault, I’ll handle it.” Standing up, Ren practically herded Natsuki out the door, who was apologising the whole way. Ren just shook his head, though, pausing when Natsuki stepped through the door.

“Thanks for trying to help me, Shinomi, but I have to fix this myself.”

He had no idea what he was going to do, but he would surely come up with something- anything, just as long as it didn’t end in Masato hating him. Natsuki held him with a steady gaze, obviously wanting to argue against Ren sorting it out on his own, but after a long moment he simply nodded and left.

And then Ren was alone.

* * *

The next two days were the most awkward of Ren’s life, and that included the time after Masato had accidentally walked in on him masturbating. He’d gone searching for Masato once he’d pulled himself together, but he’d been nowhere to be found and wasn’t answering his phone. In fact, Masato seemed to be trying to spend as little time around Ren as possible, getting up before the sun and only going back to their room when he was ready to fall straight asleep. Even Ranmaru had commented on his behaviour, although he’d told Ren to deal with it himself before it started to be a bother.

Ren hadn’t even been able to clear up the misunderstanding with Masato, considering that he could barely get the other man to look at him, much less talk to him; not that he knew how to approach the topic without making things worse.

A knock on the door woke Ren out of his early morning doze, a glance around the room telling him that Masato had already woken and escaped and that Ranmaru wasn’t there either- if he’d come back that night at all.

“Just a moment,” Ren called sleepily, grabbing a pair of pants but not bothering with a shirt. He opened the door and nearly fell over when it slammed the rest of the way, an unyielding hand planting itself in the middle of his bare chest and forcing him into the wall. 

Fuck, it was really too early for an unexpected visit from Satsuki.

“Can I...help you?” Ren panted when the air was back in his lungs, trying not to struggle against Satsuki’s iron grip. It was obvious that Satsuki wasn’t trying to actually hurt him, because they both knew that Natsuki would worry incessantly if Ren ‘mysteriously’ got injured, but he figured there would be bruises afterwards.

“Natsuki has barely slept in two days,” Satsuki snarled, leaning in so close that his breath was hot against Ren’s ear. If Ren hadn’t been worrying about the structural integrity of his ribcage, it might have almost been sexy.

That, and if he could actually manage to get it up for anyone who wasn’t Masato. But that wasn’t his current concern.

“Okay. And?” Ren said, regretting it when Satsuki’s hand pressed harder into his chest.

“He’s been so upset about you and that other asshole that he’s going to make himself sick. So I’m going to fix that here and now before I have to dangle both of you off the roof as punishment for hurting him.”

“There’s nothing to fix,” Ren said, meeting Satsuki’s angry eyes as steadily as possible. “I’m sorry about Shinomi, but-”

“But _nothing,”_ Satsuki growled and suddenly his other hand was in Ren’s back pocket.

“Uh...”

“Phone,” Satsuki demanded, Ren pointing over to where he’d left it next to his bed. With an irritated sigh, Satsuki took hold of Ren’s upper arm and marched him across the room, picking up his phone and-

Godammit, he _really_ needed to change his passcode. 

“ _There’s nothing to fix_ says the jackass who sets his lock to his idiot boyfriend’s birthday,” Satsuki muttered, seemingly more to himself than to Ren. “ _And_ he puts a heart next to his contact name, for fuck’s sake.”

Ignoring that for the sake of his pride, Ren watched as Natsuki typed out a message to Masato, a simple ‘Satsuki’s in our room’ that they both knew would bring Masato running back regardless of their awkwardness. Ren considered pointing out that whatever he was planning probably wouldn’t work if Masato brought the others with him, but he liked his arms to remain unbroken.

Tossing the phone down onto Ren’s bed, Satsuki let Ren go and stalked back to the door, leaning against the wall next to it with his arms crossed. The glare he kept pinned on Ren was enough to tell Ren not to bother trying anything, and he stood awkwardly while waiting for Masato to arrive.

As expected, the sound of running footsteps could be heard coming down the hallway, the door flying open to reveal a wide-eyed Masato, alone and looking around the room. Satsuki slipped behind him before Masato could confront him, closing the door to keep Masato and Ren inside but still taking the time to tell them, “Sort your shit out before Natsuki gets hurt, or I’ll sort it out for you- and you _won’t_ enjoy that.”

Masato immediately turned around and tried the door, but the handle barely budged; Satsuki was obviously holding it from the other side, and Ren doubted that even he and Masato together could have matched up with his ridiculous strength. His heavy sigh caught Masato’s attention, who finally gave up on the door in favour of looking at Ren.

His eyes trailed from Ren’s face down to his bare torso, and then he frowned and looked away in a manner that had Ren’s heart sinking with hurt. “Are you going to explain what’s happening here?”

“Satsuki happened,” Ren said, trying and failing for levity. He sat heavily on his bed and groaned, running his hands down his face.

“Did you and Shinomiya have a fight?” Masato asked, sounding like he was forcing himself to even say that much. “If this has happened before, maybe you shouldn’t be dating-”

“We’re not dating!” Ren finally managed to say, Masato opening his mouth, closing it and then simply blinking silently at Ren. “We’ve never dated. What you saw was-”

“If you’re just playing with him, that’s low even for you, Jinguji.”

“You really think I’m an awful person, huh?” Ren said, hurt making him snappy and mean as frustration at the whole morning carried his mouth away from him. “The useless third son, never going to amount to anything, has done nothing but hurt everyone around him since he killed his own mother during his birth…”

Masato gasped sharply, Ren only vaguely aware of how hard he was shaking. The first son of a prestigious group would never care about someone who was neither the heir nor even the spare, and as much as Ren had tried to tell himself that it was fine that Masato didn’t return his feelings apparently he wasn’t doing as well as he’d been pretending.

All he wanted was for someone to _care-_ was that so much to ask?

“-guji. Jinguji!” 

Ren snapped back to the present when his mattress shifted, Masato awkwardly perching on the edge to face him. “Jinguji, tell me what happened.”

“Natsuki was giving me advice,” Ren finally managed to say, his gaze stuck on his trembling hands. 

“Advice that involved your hand on his thigh?” Masato asked doubtfully.

“What do you want me to say?” Ren snapped, immediately feeling bad. “We’re not dating, we’re not fucking, and we’re not going to be. He inserted himself into my business and managed to make everything worse, and the most annoying part is that it’s my own goddamned fault.”

“I’m sure it’s not your fault.”

“It has to be my fault!” Ren knew he was heading into dangerous territory, but there was no way he could rein his mouth in now. “There’s something wrong with me, and there always has been. Maybe if I was good enough you’d actually like me, much less love me half as much as I love you, but for now I’m just wildly fucking everything up and making everyone else miserable.”

“You...you think I don’t like you?”

“I think you tolerate me, which is more than I can say for most people who’ve known me for as long as you have.”

“I thought I was being exceedingly obvious, and you were trying to be kind and spare my feelings by ignoring the elephant in the room.” Masato frowned, Ren finally looking up to watch him try to find the right words. The silence felt like a physical, smothering weight, and the pain in Ren’s chest couldn’t only be from the bruises left behind by Satsuki.

“When I was a child, I met a boy,” Masato started, every word obviously carefully chosen. “I remember thinking he was like the sun: bright and free in a way I had never been allowed to be. Even his hair reminded me of the sun, and I remember thinking it was one of the most beautiful things I’d ever seen.”

“And then you actually got to know me,” Ren said, bitterness seeping into every word.

“Please don’t interrupt. I won’t pretend that I never resented you: I’d been groomed from birth to take over the Hijirikawa Group, and it wasn’t until I was much older that another path opened itself up to me. On the other hand, you were always allowed to do what you wanted, to have the kind of freedom that I’d only ever dreamed of, and you showed me how to view the world through the lens of finding beauty and joy even while stuck at boring parties. As a child, I was jealous and resentful that you had everything I thought I wanted. I know now, of course, that you were hurting just as much as I was. That you still are.”

Ren’s eyes were stinging and he blinked rapidly to try and keep any tears from falling, but Masato didn’t give him any time to respond.

“I’m sorry I hit you that day. I risked everything to be here, and even then I was only good enough for the A class. My father told me that that was proof of me not being cut out for the idol life, that I should rescind my acceptance and stay home to take over the business. On the other hand, you made it into the S class and didn’t even seem to care about it; I was furious that you were making a mockery of everything I wanted. You’d changed: the burning sun of a child I had known had gone dull over the years, had closed himself off to the beauty in the world that he had exposed me to. But then I stopped to think, and realised that we’ve always been more similar than we seemed. We’re both terrified of trying and failing, both chasing the approval of our fathers, both utterly useless at expressing ourselves.”

Ren felt like he’d been flayed open, exposed and vulnerable from the knowledge that apparently Masato could see right through him, and he swallowed hard as he took advantage of the pause in Masato’s speech. “I’m not sorry that you hit me. I needed it- needed someone to knock some sense into me in a way that no one else would ever dare to do to a Jinguji.”

“But I _hurt_ you.”

“You hit exactly as hard as I’d expect from a bocchan,” Ren said, his usual defense mechanism of humour finally making an appearance. “Didn’t even leave a mark.”

“Well, that doesn’t change the fact that I’m sorry for hitting you. But you changed after that day, like the child I’d known was still there under the layers of this listless playboy you pretend to be.” Masato cleared his throat awkwardly, shifting closer and stiffly reaching out to touch the back of Ren’s hand. He didn’t seem to want to push any further, though, and Ren took a deep breath as he flipped his hand over and curled his fingers around Masato’s.

He still wasn’t quite sure what was happening, but at least his hand wouldn’t shake if he was holding onto Masato, like a lifeline saving him from drowning in his own misery.

“I...I think I fell in love with you when you took over the announcement system that day. No one else would have the unmitigated _gall_ to do something like that in front of the entire school- except for the boy who had freely run away from important events because he was _bored._ And then I thought you knew how I felt because I couldn’t help but stare at you, but were ignoring it to stop me from being crushed by rejection, which only got worse when I saw you with Shinomiya. I didn’t think I could even look at you without begging you to tell me why I couldn’t be the one for you.”

“You have to know I’m not worth it,” Ren said, staring at their joined hands. “I’m not good enough for you- we’re too different.”

“Jinguji Ren, you _complete_ me,” Masato said in a deadly certain voice, the cliche given a weight that only Masato could possibly have pulled off without sounding utterly ridiculous. “You’re my sun. That hasn’t changed.”

“You’ll get-”

“If you say burnt, I will push you off this bed.” Masato pulled his hand free, leaving Ren feeling cold, but it was only so he could awkwardly pull Ren into a hug. It was obvious that physical intimacy wasn’t Masato’s strong point, but he was so endearing and trying so hard that Ren couldn’t help but melt into him.

He was still feeling out of sorts, anger and sadness and happiness and _love_ warring inside of him, but he could sort out the finer details later. For now, he could enjoy Masato’s awkward, bony hug until one of them was summoned to deal with real life.

Which happened, unfortunately, much sooner than Ren would have liked.

Masato’s phone alarm blaring made him jump upright, letting go of Ren as if he had- amusingly enough- been burnt. “I’m sorry, Jinguji, I have to go. I can’t be late for today’s taping.”

“You’ve got a reputation to maintain, I get it,” Ren said, trying to keep his voice light to hide his disappointment. “Go, dazzle the world with your charm.”

Masato smiled shyly, ducking his head, and Ren didn’t think he’d ever get bored of that look. But before he could think about _forever,_ he realised that he should probably start from step one. “Hey, do you have any plans for tonight?”

“I can cancel,” Masato said, sounding deadly serious, and Ren laughed.

“I’m already being a terrible influence on you, but I won’t complain. Let me take you out for dinner.”

“I’d like nothing more.” Masato reached for Ren again, but then his alarm blared once more and he took a quick step back. “...Thank you, Jinguji.”

“I’ll text you later,” Ren promised, and Masato’s smile was breathtaking.

The door opened easily when he tried it, leaving Ren wondering just how long ago Satsuki had left them, but he couldn’t care about that too much. He had a job to do and a date to get ready for later on, and there was no way he was going to let himself mess this up.

But if Masato had managed to put up with so much and still, for some ungodly reason, want to spend time with Ren? Well, he had a feeling that things were going to be okay.

...God, he was going to have to thank Syo and Natsuki and they were never going to let him live it down, were they...

**Author's Note:**

> Come see me on [Tumblr](http://socialdegenerate.tumblr.com) or [Twitter](http://twitter.com/socialdegener8)


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